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Women are actually more likely to instigate fights than men are, too bad for them that men tend to be bigger and stronger and can restrain them, huh?
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I REMEMBER THE FIRST TIME I GOT punched by a girlfriend. It was during a fight on a New York City street corner, over a subject I've long since forgotten. But the punch — thrown as I leaned in to make a point, thrown reflexively, out of unchecked rage — stayed with me. It didn't hurt that much, tagging me just below the left ear. But it caused serious damage.
I didn't hit back, cry, or scream "You monster!" But my reaction was probably not what she might have hoped for. It was not: a) She must be really angry!, b) How could I have been so insensitive?, or c) What a feisty woman I have!, but, sadly, d) This bitch crazy. And by the next morning, our future had clouded over.
According to a Penn professor who studies these things, every American man has about a 28 percent chance of being struck by a woman at some point in his life (in related news, the number of girls ages 10 to 17 arrested for aggravated assault has doubled in the last 20 years). And yet no one seems to take the phenomenon that seriously. Maybe it's because men, generally speaking, are bigger and stronger, and we assume there's a real limit to the physical damage women could actually inflict. We don't picture these scuffles resulting in bloody noses and black eyes or a trip to the station house. Furthermore, pop culture has made the idea of a pretty girl whaling on a guy a wacky comedy staple — Angelina Jolie smashing wine bottles over Brad Pitt's head in Mr. & Mrs. Smith and Cameron Diaz coldcocking Edward Burns in The Holiday were both played for laughs. But the reality of getting hit by your girlfriend isn't so sexy or hilarious.
A male friend of mine — let's call him Tom — was hit several times by his. "We'd get into these exhausting fights," he tells me. "Like, 10 p.m. to 6 a.m., where nothing would turn the volume down except sex and sleep. With her, everything was fine in the morning, but I was upset for days. She actually seemed to think it was sexy. I remember her showing me finger-shaped bruises on her arms where I had restrained her from swinging at me — and she raised an eyebrow, made a saucy comment. But I was petrified. I was doing stuff like putting the knives up on the very top shelf. For me, it wasn't fun at all."
I've gleaned similar tales from other male friends, most of them told sheepishly, most of them prompting the same question from women: "Well, what'd he do?" While I'm tempted to flip the genders and then see how the question plays, I have to admit that I, at least, was far from a battered innocent. In one case, I said something cruelly dismissive about a project that Ann (let's call her) was working on. I was an asshole, putting down her ambitions. But the punch was more than I deserved. In another case, I said that I really needed to work this one night, needed to be left alone, and if Rachel (let's call her) couldn't respect this, maybe she and I weren't right for each other. After some increasingly angry exchanges, I turned my head and caught a clog in the facial region known as the supraorbital ridge. It was a get-out-of-jail-free card — my own jerkdom had been eclipsed — but I was also headed out the door.
Honestly, I can't believe how abusive women are to day. It sucks that a lot of women falsify DV (not all mind you, but a lot do) and men under report it.
I know why it's under reported, it's an insult to themselves plus it'll get thrown out of a court room in a heart beat.
It's as though everyone thinks men should be able to put up with this shit. When they shouldn't, really. I've known guys who have went though this before, one happened to be a very close friend of mine - I lost it and, well, let's just say it ended horribly for the both of us.
Point is, he had emotional problems and abandonment issues - ya know, his father never loved him, his mom was a slutty whore who left him at home alone as a child often. So even though he was fucking miserable with that bitch, he didn't wanna leave her or fight back.
I swear, every time I saw him he had a new bruise or cut on him.
People glorify this yet downplay it when it's serious and it pisses me off to no end.
Women nowadays think they are entitled to do whatever the hell that want just for being born without something dangling between their legs - seriously!
I mean, people these days act like if a guy got punched by a girl then he did something to deserve it - take it from me, women will gladly attacked unprovoked (hell, I did it enough, I should know).
People act like men don't have emotions either, like that it's impossible that a man would want a loving and strong relationship.
I've hit guys before, I'm really too much of a wimp to do any damage though. Normally, I'm just frustrated with them, it's in my nature to get physically combative in a non-serious way. I'm not actually trying to hurt them, I'm trying to get my point across - by means of shaking, pounding on the chest, jumping on them, or punching their arm. I couldn't do any real damage if i wanted to, honestly when I do that - it's the same as when I mock-fight with friends and family.
So I'm not talking about that kind of violence.
That's more playful violence.
Real violence is attacking with the intent to harm and it sickens me to see people hit others when not for self defense.
In short, I blame Feminism. Women think they can to whatever and think they are better than men (though lie and claim they are equal to men then act differently than that) just for having a pussy.
What sickens me more is when they act as though they are the victim of the whole thing.
I'm not attempting to downplay male on female DV, but really female on male DV is serious as well.
Sorry for the rant, this shit just pisses me off.
Also, I don't agree with the last part of the article. True, I tend to cut down many people with my words, but I shouldn't and I try not to.
Still i think it's a form of verbal abuse (hence why I'm trying to stop). Though in my case, it's usually replied with a punch, kick, bite, scratch, kneeing, or something overly-violent.
I'm a fucking punching bag when I do that, you'd think I'd learn father, huh?
Shout, Shout, Let it all Out, These are the Things I Can do Without You Shouldn't Have to Jump for Joy, You Shouldn't Have to Shout for Joy
They Give You Life and in Return You Gave 'em Hell As Cold as Ice - No Bitch, You're Ice Ice Baby I Hope We Live to Tell the Tale, I Hope We Live to Shout the Tale
Will You Never Shout? And When You've Taken Down Your Guard... If I Could Change Your Mind, I'd Really Love to Break Your Heart! Come On Let Me Shout Shout Let Me, Come On Let Me Shout Shout!
I totally agree with this. Domestic violence is heavily reported but only when men hit women. When women hit men, everyone just thinks he would have deserved it, or is able to just deal with it. Women being violent to men is a massive problem and nothing is being done about it. Our government has spent millions providing help and support for women who are subject to domestic. And what do men have?? A handful of small charities who actually realise the problem.
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Originally Posted by Marietta
In short, I blame Feminism. Women think they can to whatever and think they are better than men (though lie and claim they are equal to men then act differently than that) just for having a pussy.
What sickens me more is when they act as though they are the victim of the whole thing.
This, I think, is the reason behind it. Yes, in history women had no rights. But that doesn't give them the reason to do whatever the hell they feel like today.
Invention, my dear friends, is 93% perspiration, 6% electricity, 4% evaporation, and 2% butterscotch ripple.
~
The truth is out there...anybody got the URL?
~
Don't forget to be awesome.
Our government has spent millions providing help and support for women who are subject to domestic. And what do men have?? A handful of small charities who actually realise the problem.
Exactly! I mean, why just not have shelters for victims rather than just female victims?
Yes, I know, female victims are more common but that's no reason to shut men out as well!
Shout, Shout, Let it all Out, These are the Things I Can do Without You Shouldn't Have to Jump for Joy, You Shouldn't Have to Shout for Joy
They Give You Life and in Return You Gave 'em Hell As Cold as Ice - No Bitch, You're Ice Ice Baby I Hope We Live to Tell the Tale, I Hope We Live to Shout the Tale
Will You Never Shout? And When You've Taken Down Your Guard... If I Could Change Your Mind, I'd Really Love to Break Your Heart! Come On Let Me Shout Shout Let Me, Come On Let Me Shout Shout!
Our government has spent millions providing help and support for women who are subject to domestic. And what do men have?? A handful of small charities who actually realise the problem.
Yes, because men, whose strength and fighting capabilities far exceed those of women, need to be protected. The reason there are these shelters and orginizations to aid battered women is that women need it. Women by nature aren't nearly as aggressive as some men, and men are far superior to women in combat. I'm not claiming it's like this in all cases, because there are a few exceptions; but those exceptions are in the overwhelming minority. Quite frankly, it's much more difficult for a woman to leave an abusive relationship than it is for a man who is hardly affected by the punch of the abuser. My post perhaps screams sexism, but in the real world, that's how it is.
That isn't so much the point.
As I stated, why make shelters just for women? Why not make it for anyone who is abused?
Some men are just flat out weaklings after all. I've heard of a lot of guys get abused by other men, and not women.
So really, why not make have a shelter for anyone who is abused and not just for women who are abused.
Shout, Shout, Let it all Out, These are the Things I Can do Without You Shouldn't Have to Jump for Joy, You Shouldn't Have to Shout for Joy
They Give You Life and in Return You Gave 'em Hell As Cold as Ice - No Bitch, You're Ice Ice Baby I Hope We Live to Tell the Tale, I Hope We Live to Shout the Tale
Will You Never Shout? And When You've Taken Down Your Guard... If I Could Change Your Mind, I'd Really Love to Break Your Heart! Come On Let Me Shout Shout Let Me, Come On Let Me Shout Shout!
That isn't so much the point.
As I stated, why make shelters just for women? Why not make it for anyone who is abused?
Some men are just flat out weaklings after all. I've heard of a lot of guys get abused by other men, and not women.
So really, why not make have a shelter for anyone who is abused and not just for women who are abused.
Because seldom will you find a man who is being abused by a woman and can't do anything about it by himself.
Because seldom will you find a man who is being abused by a woman and can't do anything about it by himself.
No, this is surprisingly common. Men aren't the strong, fighting, aggressive people that the world seems to think. If they are being abused in the home, chances are they'll keep quiet about it because they're afraid. Their friends and family will either not take them seriously or laugh at them for it and there's no help in society for them.
Men can't just deal with emotions and things in the way everyone thinks they can and domestic violence towards men is actually a massive problem thats often hidden from the public eye.
Invention, my dear friends, is 93% perspiration, 6% electricity, 4% evaporation, and 2% butterscotch ripple.
~
The truth is out there...anybody got the URL?
~
Don't forget to be awesome.
No, this is surprisingly common. Men aren't the strong, fighting, aggressive people that the world seems to think. If they are being abused in the home, chances are they'll keep quiet about it because they're afraid. Their friends and family will either not take them seriously or laugh at them for it and there's no help in society for them.
Men can't just deal with emotions and things in the way everyone thinks they can and domestic violence towards men is actually a massive problem thats often hidden from the public eye.
As a man, and as a person who knows many men, I can tell you that it's not common whatsoever. Look, in the end, in all but a few cases men are completely capable of defending themselves from abuse from females. Why aren't men prioritized with this domestic abuse? Because men are stronger than women and it's absurd how much easier it is for a man to leave an abusive female than it is for a female to leave an abusive male. One could argue that some men just don't want to defend themselves, but in that case the only person is to blame. You have to strength, the option, to leave, but you don't - that's on you.
As a man, and as a person who knows many men, I can tell you that it's not common whatsoever. Look, in the end, in all but a few cases men are completely capable of defending themselves from abuse from females. Why aren't men prioritized with this domestic abuse? Because men are stronger than women and it's absurd how much easier it is for a man to leave an abusive female than it is for a female to leave an abusive male. One could argue that some men just don't want to defend themselves, but in that case the only person is to blame. You have to strength, the option, to leave, but you don't - that's on you.
Just because you're a man, it doesn't mean you speak for all men. I'm a man too believe it or not and I know that it does happen. The reason you don't see it is because it's always kept behind closed doors and out of the public eye. Men who are subject to domestic abuse often live in fear and feel as though they can't do anything. Sure, on average men are stronger than women but that doesn't mean men can just stop the violence happening. If he was to hit the woman and the woman reported him, who are the police more likely to believe? The woman.
If we're going to be stereotyping here (as you have), then women are more manipulative then men so they are able to control the man in a violent relationship and stop him from doing anything about it. They can use all sorts of blackmail and threats to keep him quiet, exactly the same as male to female violence.
Invention, my dear friends, is 93% perspiration, 6% electricity, 4% evaporation, and 2% butterscotch ripple.
~
The truth is out there...anybody got the URL?
~
Don't forget to be awesome.
Just because you're a man, it doesn't mean you speak for all men.
I'm not speaking for all men. My gender is relevant in the sense that it provides me an insight into male behavior.
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Originally Posted by Rogan
I'm a man too believe it or not and I know that it does happen.
Great. I never said otherwise. I stated that it's not common, not that it doesn't occur.
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Originally Posted by Rogan
The reason you don't see it is because it's always kept behind closed doors and out of the public eye.
You're making a lot of assumptions. I never claimed that I don't see it.
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Originally Posted by Rogan
Men who are subject to domestic abuse often live in fear and feel as though they can't do anything.
Those men need to grow a pair.
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Originally Posted by Rogan
Sure, on average men are stronger than women but that doesn't mean men can just stop the violence happening.
If I, as an average male, can defend myself from an average female, than any other average male can. As I previously stated, if you have a way out but don't take it it's on your. You're the only one to blame for your fear. Essentially there's no real physical threat for a male. Men are naturally more aggressive and violent- add to that their superior strength- so it's not difficult why a female would be scared to leave an abusive relationship. But men have it so much easier and simplified, which is why there is no excuse for a man to continue being in an abusive relationship with a female.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rogan
If he was to hit the woman and the woman reported him, who are the police more likely to believe? The woman.
Don't hit her. If she's living in your apartment/house, kick her out. She doesn't want to leave? Call the police. If you're living in her apartment/house, leave. She attacks you or stalks you? Call the police and file a police report, or get a restraining order. It's THAT simple.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rogan
If we're going to be stereotyping here (as you have), then women are more manipulative then men so they are able to control the man in a violent relationship and stop him from doing anything about it. They can use all sorts of blackmail and threats to keep him quiet, exactly the same as male to female violence.
If a man is stupid enough to remain in an abusive relationship because of a few embarrassing stories, than he's beyond help. I, for one- and this goes for all the people I know- would never allow myself to be abused based on some half-assed manipulation and/or blackmail.
Today's Toppers
Women Who Hit Men
