Teen Forums - Teen Chat, Teen Help, Teen Advice & Support

I am TOTALLY freaking out right now... Please help!

Ok so I posted earlier this week about my mess with my boyfriend and stuff but me and him broke up. I decided to go to a party with my friend Nicole, and when I got there this other girl named Emily was there who I do NOT like. Emily is always being so rude and mean to me and cussing at me.

So when Emily saw me she was like "why are you here?". I wasnt in the mood to argue with her so I was like "get the fuck out of my face you ugly slut and stay the fuck away from me tonight".

She walked away and then the guys came with the liquor. there was vodka and whiskey and stuff, I didn't want to get too drunk (I am only 17) so I split a mickey of whiskey with Nicole. We were tipsy but not really that drunk.

Emily got really drunk and when she gets drunk she loves to fight.

So she came up to me and she was pulling my hair and stuff and I told her to leave me alone.

Then she pushed me and I turned around and I pushed her REALLY hard and she fell down.

I started feeling sorta sick so I went outside into the backyard which was empty.

Emily followed me outside but I felt sick like I was about to throw up.

Emily grabbed me and she was swearing at me and she was choking me really hard and she was cussing. She smashed me into the wooden fence while she was choking me and I couldn't breathe and I felt sick, I was wearing heels too so I lost my balance and fell.

Then she got on top of me and she was choking me and smashing my head in the ground, I started to zone out and things started to go white, I couldn't scream because she was choking me. I felt like I had to throw up but I couldn't because she kept choking me, then I grabbed a rock off the ground, it was pretty big and I just struck her in the back of the head with it. She didn't let go, she kept choking me so I hit her 4 or 5 times really hard. She was screaming but she kept choking me but not as hard anymore so I hit her one last time SUPER hard, then she collapsed on top of me. I pushed her off of me and got up and I threw up, then I ran inside and I realized I was covered in blood (her blood), it was on my hands and all over her clothes.

I was crying and Nicole came and I told her what happened, Nicole was pretty sober at this point and she helped me pick up Emily and we brought her inside and the back of Emily's head was smashed in and it was bleeding like crazy, I called 911 and told them what happened and the entire party stopped.

When the cops came I told them about how she was choking me and I did it in self defense, and they could see scratches and markings all over my neck so they knew I wasn't lying. They questioned me in an empty room and let me go, they said they won't be pressing charges and I have no idea what was happening, everyone left.

I told my parents and they're helping me but I have no idea what to do, everyones gonna hate me, I am trying to find out what happened to Emily but no one knows.

People at the party said they put her in a stretcher and took her away in the ambulance but they covered her entire body with a sheet so no one saw her. But Nicole said she saw Emily and she looked super pale. I am so worried, I heard Emily is ok but I hit her 7 times with a rock and bashed in the back of her head, there was so much blood and I am worried she might be dead or something... PLEASE HELP!

I am thinking of going to Emily's house but I have NO idea what to do.

Do you know the hospital she's in? call it up and ask for her or information on her etc.
If not you can try going to her house.

I suggest you seriously look at your life, the parties you go to, etc. If you were super drunk, and she wasn't choking you and something like this happened and IF she did die you could be charged with man slaughter. It's serious stuff.. you have to be careful. Especially when you start things like calling her a ugly slut, etc. that would be you provoking it which can get you in trouble. But for now, just try and find out how she's doing.

Little white flowers will never awaken you, not when the cold depths have all but overtaken you.

Dearest, The days are all so long,
and in the shadows I spend them all.
My heart and I long for slumber.
Slumber I'm caressing you, I bless your touch, I lust for you.
Slumber you are not a dream, Not as much as you seem.
- Joao <3

Agree with Kate. I mean, you were just defending yourself. However, you did provoke the situation. I strongly suggest staying away from the bottle for a little while. I know you weren't in the mood, but you should have ignored her. If she presses charges, you'll both get in trouble, really.

I would just reevalutate where you go, and what you do when you go there.

"A toothache, or a violent passion, is not necessarily diminished by our knowledge of its causes, its character, its importance or insignificance".- T.S. Eliot

WOW, that sounds pretty intense.
I think that maybe you should wait until she is home and feeling a little better before you contact her. Maybe call up her parents and explain what went on and give them a sincere apology. Maybe even send his something to show how sorry you are.
You both were wrong in at least some little way. I mean, honestly if someone was choking me like that, I would try to stop them, but I would think that my friends would at least try to help me as well.
I personally do not approve of underage kid's drinking and partying. Yes, I am only 17, but I had a somewhat similar experience like this while I was drinking. Therefore, I think that this entire situation could have been handled a lot better if their was no alcohol present, or if someone was mature about it, and left before the situation got out of hand.

But what should I have done, I ran outside because I didn't feel good and she followed me out and she was choking me, I wasn't that drunk at the time and I started to black out and see stars from being choked (my neck is STILL sore today) and I hit her becasue she wouldn't stop choking me.

IMO? you shouldn't have called her and said the things you did. She may be those things yes but it's disgusting and just plan immature. You're a grown woman, you should be far more classy and respectable then calling some chick a ugly slut because you dislike her to her face. And IMO you should not be drinking or really at parties where there's drinking. Like above said, underage drinking and partying is just stupid and dangerous. Yes, you had no other choice then to grab a rock but the BEST choice is to not get yourself in that situation in the first place. You're only 17 and already in this huge mess, where, if went horribly wrong you could be in jail.

Little white flowers will never awaken you, not when the cold depths have all but overtaken you.

Dearest, The days are all so long,
and in the shadows I spend them all.
My heart and I long for slumber.
Slumber I'm caressing you, I bless your touch, I lust for you.
Slumber you are not a dream, Not as much as you seem.
- Joao <3

If I was in the situation, I probably would not have even went to the party in the first place considering that I was not in a good mood to start with. You should have thought that there was going to be at least one person there that you would not get along with. Plus when she first started on me, I would have left. I have no time for her petty drama. You did good by walking outside to get away from her, I just wonder why your friends did not help you at all..I would help pull someone off my best friend if they were being choked.

I think you should just explain to her parents what happened and apologize to both her and her family.

very excellent point you have

To be honest - there wasn't much else you could do, I think. You were defending yourself- as is your right to do. We can talk about all of the "what if/what should's" that lead up to the situation, but once you were in that situation... you did what any human being would have done.

- She was drunk.
- She was choking you.
- You couldn't breathe.
- You were starting to black out.

That she was drunk and had no use of her capacity to think clearly - she may very well have taken it to far and you may not be here. However, not knowing what happened to her would be terrifying. But remember this, you were protecting yourself.

"There is a sacredness in tears. They are not the mark of weakness, but of power. They speak more eloquently than ten thousand tongues. They are messengers of overwhelming grief...and unspeakable love."
- Washington Irving

As David said, you were protecting yourself. Personally, I don't care what you said. She took it to the next level. Everyone here is saying you should have been the bigger person, yet she's the one who got physical first. When I'm not in the mood, I do the same thing. Essentially I tell people to fuck off. But if someone takes it a step farther, that's their fault. Granted, being rude and using my words inappropriately was not a wise thing to do, but in your case she was rude to you first. And you responded with the same "force" if you will. She is the one who later on used an escalated force.

Yes she was drunk. Yes you were drunk. She still attacked you first. Then when you left the room, she followed you and continued to assault you. If any law suit is filed, you'll win. She was instigating by being rude the second you got there and then got physical first. You were not right in getting drunk and going to that party, but you were right in the way you responded to this girl's actions. If I were you, (other than attending that party and getting drunk) I wouldn't have done anything different. And I have to be very careful about what I do to maintain a position at the police department, so I'm very careful about what I do.

You did good. You protected your life. She probably would have killed you if you didn't stop her due to how much alcohol she consumed. She wouldn't have known when to stop, even after you passed out from her choking you. Don't feel sorry. She learned a lesson, and so did you.
You: Don't go to parties and drink under aged
Her: Don't pick fights and drink under aged.