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I don't know if I posted this here before or not, but I'm 99% sure I didn't, and that it was another website. Warning, sexuality is referenced.

A man goes for a checkup at his doctor. His doctor hands him a jar, and says he needs a semen sample to get a sperm count. The man comes back the next day with the jar empty. The doctor asked what happened.

"Well, you see doc, it went like this: First I tried, with my left hand, and then my right hand, but nothing. Then my wife tried, with both hands, but nothing. Then her mouth, first with teeth in, then with teeth out. We even asked the nice, teenage girl next door to help, she tried with both hands, and then her mouth, but still nothing."

The doctor was shocked. "You asked your teenage neighbor for help?"

"Yes, I did. And no matter what we did, we couldn't get that damn jar open!"

Hahahahah xD that's hilarious.

Little white flowers will never awaken you, not when the cold depths have all but overtaken you.

Dearest, The days are all so long,
and in the shadows I spend them all.
My heart and I long for slumber.
Slumber I'm caressing you, I bless your touch, I lust for you.
Slumber you are not a dream, Not as much as you seem.
- Joao <3

tehe that's funneh

ahahaha is funny because we assume they tried to handle his penis

And now the joke isn't funny

Spring showers Bring May flowers

That is a hilarious joke.

What has the human race come to?

C'mon, really? Take a joke