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Old 22-01-18, 02:03 AM   #1
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Icon4 Afraid of my parents, need help!

O.K, so I went on a trip with my dad, because Mom wanted me to, even though I knew better. He found out I'm a lesbian, which I didn't care about. Then he loudly announced it to an entire restaurant FULL. OF. PEOPLE. But they were random strangers, so whatever. THEN on the second-to-last night before bed he threatened to tell my mother, who I knew wouldn't care. BUT he said she would "try to fix this" and I inquired further. He said he would make me go to church three days a week. Then later at dinner the last day, he and my sister (who was responsible for the outing @ the restaurant) planned to put on a Christmas play for the family next December, and they tried to force me to play the part of Mary. I told them I would do it if THEY would act the leading roles in a play I write. I figured I would play the Goddess and make Dad do some pretty awkward stuff on stage. Then Dad shut me down saying "We don't need that. We're normal. You need religious activities often because you need fixing." Me: "Do Pagan rituals count? This could be fun." Dad said "No way. Maybe church will fix you, and you being fixed is not negotiable." Me: "Yeah, right. Neither you nor Mom will take me cause you don't wanna go." Dad: "Your grandmother(who's the biggest homophobe I know) can come take you there every weekend." Me: "She won't wanna be here every weekend." Dad: She won't mind if I out you." Me: "You wouldn't dare." Dad: O.K. Either I tell Grandma and you get involved in the nearest Catholic church, OR I tell Mom and we send you to "therapy" for this. And why are we even discussing this? I told you I don't have time for lesbians. Why can't you be like your sister? She got invited to hang out with a lovely young man this weekend. She's not allowed to go, but she got invited! Me: (shocked at his homophobia) *as sweetly as I can manage* May I have a couple weeks to make up my mind? (I was buying time because it was all I could come up with.) Dad: Of course! Longer til I have to do something about this!
That was terrifying. I need help! Most girls would just take the church as a useless chore, but I can't because I'm Wiccan and my beliefs are the most important part of my identity. Does anyone know how I can either get around this, or fake my way through the type of therapy he's planning to put me through? Also, what exactly does "therapy" as he put it usually entail?
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Old 29-01-18, 10:41 PM   #2
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Default Re: Afraid of my parents, need help!

Update: Dad's told me I have two weeks or he's going ahead with "therapy". I need urgent advice!
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Old 30-01-18, 12:32 PM   #3
 
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Default Re: Afraid of my parents, need help!

Imo your dad is obsessed with that "therapy" stuff. He goes too far with it. Find out about your rights. Contact human rights organizations, or organizations that are concerned with protecting children, especially children with LGBT issues, and actively provide help in case of doubt.
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Old 30-01-18, 03:52 PM   #4
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Default Re: Afraid of my parents, need help!

He tends to joke about anything under the sun, but you're right, he finally sounds serious. Might be fun to screw with the therapist, but I don't want to cause trouble for the poor sap that has to treat me. He probably feels bad enough about what he does to people. How do you suggest going about finding out what rights I have and what my options are to protect myself?
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Old 01-02-18, 11:05 AM   #5
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Default Re: Afraid of my parents, need help!

Talk to a school counsellor, police officer, doctor, or some other professional whose job it is to help people








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Old 03-02-18, 03:43 AM   #6
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Default Re: Afraid of my parents, need help!

Ok, let's see. Already talked to school counselor. He thinks Dad is joking and he isn't taking me seriously. I've been to see the doctor for something else just last month, and Mom will only let me and my sister go to the doctor's once every four months, and we have to ask if we need to go more than once a year. As for police, either I'd have to go to the station and Mom would know when I wasn't in the house or yard and Dad didn't have me, or I'd have to look up their non-emergency number and it'd show up on the phone bill. I really don't know what sort of therapy Dad is threatening, so I can't tell whether getting in trouble for "a frivolous doctor visit" or "wasting law enforcement's time" is worth it. If you know, could you explain so I can decide whether it's worth the trouble to avoid?
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Old 03-02-18, 07:09 AM   #7
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Default Re: Afraid of my parents, need help!

After/before school, or on lunch if you are allowed out of school for lunch, you could go to the station and ask there.

It is not wasting their time if you feel like you may be put into a situation which is not what you want to be in/think may be detrimental to your physical/mental health.

As for the school counsellor, explain to them that you understand that they think your dad is joking, but it is really worrying you, and that as much as you'd like to hope he's joking, you want to be ready for the worst. Normal parents don't try and force therapy on their child.








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Old 06-02-18, 01:23 AM   #8
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Default Re: Afraid of my parents, need help!

Have no way to get to the station from my school. Moot point anyway, I take the school bus there (bus comes at an ungodly hour), Mom picks me up directly after, they might let me leave campus for lunch, but it's ten minutes long. As for school counselor, I was covering his a**. He is one of the people I know who advocates for the use of that type of "therapy". I used quotation marks because I inferred its' goal from context and doubt that it works. I have made a good guess about the goal of the type of "therapy" my dad is threatening, but I don't know how dangerous it is, if you know what he's really threatening, could you let me know so I know if it's worth a call to the police or the local equal rights group?
As for getting out if push came to shove, I thought about faking insanity. The reasoning was that they can't send me to the kind of "therapy" they are threatening if I'm locked in an insane asylum on the other side of the city. I decided that if I had to do it I would walk into the living room with huge spaced-out eyes, lay down on the floor and say things like "All hail Goddess Artemis" "We must honor her as our Lady" and "Oh great Goddess, accept us as your children" all in a loud monotone voice. Then I realized that the asylum would find out the very thing I don't want to tell Mom, because it would be on the paperwork, and probably do exactly what Dad is threatening. So I discarded it. But just for curiosity's sake, do you think that would actually get me committed to a mental health facility, or would it be dismissed as a religious fit, or somewhere in between?

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