Teen Forums - Teen Chat, Teen Help, Teen Advice & Support

Hello. I am 17 and so is my boyfriend.

My boyfriend: (named Bob for conversation sake)

Bob is a really nice man who is trying everything he can to be the one for me. I don't mind him as he is my first boyfriend and I am his first girlfriend, but lately I know I want to go out with other people. Nothing is wrong with him, but I just want to go out on other dates with different people,- and well, hang out with other guys besides him. I almost feel guilty for thinking other guys are cute, but I don't go any farther than looking at them or having a small conversation.

I am never the one to cheat, but I know I'm a natural flirt (can't help it). But I will never cheat. I don't do that and I think it is sick to do so- but I don't know how I can break it to him that I want to see other people.... but I don't want to tell him that factor really.

I just want to find a way to take a break from the commitment really. He is a cute gentleman with a good heart.



Any advice? I am new to dating and this is my first relationship (and it is a serious one). ---> no we never made love or anything. But we both believe cheating is wrong and we've been together for months.

Help please.

The best thing you can do is be totally honest with him. Meet with him in person and tell him pretty much what you've said in your post. That there's nothing wrong with him and he's a cute gentleman with a good heart but you want to take a break from the commitment.

I know it will be hard but he deserves the truth and in the long run, you'll feel better knowing that you didn't end it on a lie.

I'm not planning on doing it soon. But he wants us to be forever when I just don't feel THAT strongly of him. I really like him, and he's a great first boyfriend. He says he never will break up with me, and means it (I believe him).

So that means if we do I have to be the one to do it, and that's hard for me to picture. I mean one time when he thought we were when I was upset with him once he started to cry (tear up) while trying not to staring at me.

That made me melt, but how can I comfort him? He makes me feel like without me he'd be lost. For I am a very independant person, but he needs me more than I need him.

The first thing you need to realize, is that you're going to hurt him one way or another. There is no way to break up from someone who loves you without some pain involved.

The second thing to realize, is that unless something very surprising happens, you're going to have to put him through this sooner or later.

The third thing to realize, is once you've understood that you want to break up, not telling him so is pretty unfair.

How to do it best? The person who knows that best is you. Unfortunately, that's the forth thing to realize. No advice from anyone can be better than your own understanding of how he takes things.

The truth is one popular option. "It's not you, it's me" (rephrased well enough to hide that this is what you're actually saying) is another. What works better depends on your both. You know best.

Don't be hard on yourself. If you feel like moving on, you're doing the both of you a favor by doing so.

Anyone else?

I'm going to echo Rogan, but build on it.

Communication. You don't want to be in this relationship as it stands. That doesn't necessarily mean you dislike him, as you've said, but it's obvious you wanna test the waters. Perfectly natural.

However, you're being dishonest to him by keeping this from him. You essentially reinforce your relationship even as you want to break it off. It's only going to make your break up nastier than it may already be.

There is no easy solution here, but there is a right one and it's honesty. Relationships must be built on solid foundations of communication and trust. Failing to communicate will make the relationship collapse eventually.

Yeah. I've talked to him about it. He got really sad but he says he at least wants to enjoy as much time with me as he can until then. (like the title says: he is truely in love with me).

I feel like I'm teasing him :( when I'm open and honest, he just accepts it and still loves me.. I don't know how he see's me like a goddess in his world. But to him I am... I am not that great...

Looks like he is. Unfortunately, I think that the best way to help him is to keep a distance. Not fun for anyone, but fair.

Everyone else has said all you need to know really and now it's up to to you on what you want to do but I wouldn't keep going out with him if you want to break up. Give him some respect and do it sooner so he can get over you, instead of months later when he loves you more and thinks everything is fine.

to who it was asking this question,
its kinda simple, there are at least 3.5 Billion guys, and at least more than a 100 mill who are within ur age, imagine having met only 1 of them, its like saying uve tried only one flavour of ice cream, but thats the only one for you, u getting the drift, besides, ur 17, ur supposed to be having the time of ur life, do u u know for a fact, the probability of either one of u cheating is high, seeing that uve never experienced anyone elses company, i promised myself i aint getting into anything serious until im 25, cause, this period of our life is never going to come again.. explain the ice cream thing to him, it should work,