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One of my friends (lets call her Jane) was seeing this boy (lets call him Bob), and ended the relationship after a week of actually being together. When she told me it was over she told me her reasons were because she didn't see Bob in a romantic way and saw him more as a friend, and didn't find him particuarly attractive. Bob is good friends with another of my friends (lets call her Emma), and the one day invited me out with herself and Bob. This was the first time I had spent some time with Bob, and we got on really really well, had the same sense of humor and the same interests. He asked me out with just the two of us so I went along because I really enjoy his company. At the end of the night he kissed me and told me that he really liked me and we have been in a relationship for 4 months since. When Jane first found out we were seeing each other she went crazy and told me "its an unwritten rule to go out with a mates ex", and completely abandoned me, taking my other friends with her. Am I right in thinking that it's completely unfair and selfish for her to do this, or am I a complete bitch for doing this in the first place? They had a very brief relationship so I assumed at the time she would be happy for me, and wouldn't let a brief sneeze of her past affect our friendship. I am very very happy with Bob, and he is the first person I have truely loved and I know we will be together for a long time.

I suppose what I really want to know is wether everyone would react like this or wether my "friends" wern't true friends to begin with?

In answer to your question; no, I wouldn't have reacted in the way that your friend did. In fact, if anyone wanted to try a relationship with any of my exs, they'd be more than welcome, no skin off my nose! Although from firsthand experience I'd advice them against it, hahaa.

A mantra I enjoy is "exs are exs for a reason", and, sometimes, that reason is as simple as people just not getting along as much as they once expected. Reading your post, it doesn't sound to me like you've done anything malicious or that you've overstepped any boundaries.

Having said that, I suppose your friend is entitled to feel sourly about the whole thing. Of course she's entitled to feel however she likes, but I imagine that seeing a friend with a guy that she went off of seems a bit like betrayal.

How long has it been, and is there any chance that you'll make amends? I'm sure that with time and explanation, she could come around to the situation and realise that it doesn't have to affect your friendship - after all, her relationship with him was very brief!

STOP. ARE YOU READING THE ABOVE POST?
If not, do it. I'm beginning to get the impression that 50% of TF is populated by literate parrots/sentient mirrors.

Thhhhhhiiiiissss.

You did nothing wrong. The relationship had ended between your friend and Bob, you met Bob and began to like him, you both decided to take it further and entered a relationship.

The unwritten rule about not going out with a mate's ex is unwritten for a reason. It doesn't exist. As long as you are happy doing it, you can date whoever the hell you want, regardless of what your so-called friends think.

How old are you, make I ask? When you said your friend Jane took your friends away, I get the impression this is another petty-teenage disagreement.

"Unwritten" rules are usually quoted by those too jealous to recognize good boundaries!

The "Written" rule is that if someone is seeing another person, both are off limits. Once that changes, all bets are off, 'ownership' only lasts for the duration of the lease!

Your friend has much to learn, you did nothing wrong.

I think you should make it clear to your friend that your in the right and she's in the wrong. You don't have some kind of rulebook which you must consult before every action takes place, neither is he an object in which you can own and not give away as to me thats what she seems to see him as.

As long as your happy with the relationship, you should repress any feelings of guilt and look forward to the happy times ahead.

Hope it all works out for the best x

Well my girlfriend is best friends with a girl I was 'seeing'.
I never got to see her at all and it was over before long. But then her friend developed feelings for me. She encouraged her friend to open up to me and we both asked her for permission.

They're still best friends. I'm still friends with the girl. Nothing's awkward at all.
Your friend is being a right bitch acting like that, she's only really doing it for a warped sense of pride, it appears.

No, you are not a bad person!

you're friend clearly stated that she did not have any intrest in him and by coincidence you did! she wasn't happy with him and it turns out you 2 have alot in common and enjoy each others company! i think it would be different if you're friend actually had feelings for him and he dumped her, but that is not the case! you should be content with 'Bob' (nice name!). you're friend is probably annoyed that your relationship is going better with him than hers did! its called JEALOUSY! the green eyed monster!

Okay, babe, that can go to hell. What kind of shiiz is that. I let my friends date my ex and that's me being a good friend. If our relationship didnt work out well, then give theirs a chance. That only shows you that, that girl is not a good friend and you are never a horrible person. You are just in love and fate is just fickle bunch that you fell in love with her ex. Dont mind her.

If it was a messy break up, then I would say stay away from him. But it seems like this was not the case, so you're good. If she didn't see him in a romantic way, I don't see why it would be a huge problem. I can understand if she were a little mad for a bit, but there is no reason for her to abandon you and get all pissy about it. As Rawr!<3 said, she may just be a little jealous.