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My mum let my brothers mate live at ours for a while due to shortage of money. But he sold a bit of drugs to my boyfriend just the once for him to try them.
His mum found them in his room ¬¬
My mum has kicked the guy out of the house. But my boyfriends mum thinks i do drugs (which i dont) and thinks if he had never met me this wouldnt of happened.
My boyfriends not allowed out of the house and hes not allowed to mine. I got a text of him this morning saying his mums coming round tomorrow to break us up.
Obviously none of us are going to let that happen. But she will stop us visiting each other :/
I dont know what to do. I wont let her win but how am i supposed to see him and make his mum believe me that i dont have anything to do with the drugs and i dont smoke at all.
Honestly, when a person tries drugs, they're signing themselves up to face all the circumstances that go along with it.
I'm not saying I'm against drugs like Marijuana,but he seemed to think he was grown up enough to handle buying it and trying it, so he's grown up enough to face the circumstances like an adult.
If you both are still young enough to be living at home and your parents are still legally responsible for you, they have every right to do what they feel necessary to keep it from happening again.
Even if you ARE of legal age, you(and your boyfriend) still live under your parents' roofs and have to obey their rules.
Not many people are going to sympathize with you and while they may not succeed in ending your relationship, his mother is perfectly within her right to ground him and prevent him from seeing you.
Yeah i understand that, but its not my fault he took drugs. Why punish me about it.
He should be punished, fair does. But to take someone he loves of him? That wont solve anything, just make him worse. I cant stop seeing him, he obviously wont try them again and the guy has moved out of my house.
But i disagree that she has the right to break us up. If i had sold him them or encouraged him then yeah. But i have done no such thing
She's not intentionally punishing you.
She's punishing him.
It affects you, yes, but the punishment is intended for him.
The drugs were also sold to him by someone living in YOUR house.
She still has perfectly good reason not to want him there, and as a parent, it's also understandable for her judgment to be a bit fuzzy. You live in the house where he got the drugs.You may not have sold them to him, but you were part of the situation and why would she believe that he would never take the drugs again?
He already broke her trust once so that argument isn't going to fly with her or any parent concerned for her child's well being.
I didnt know they were sold in MY house. And the guy isnt here anymore.
Im against drug to and he's promised not to touch them again. and trust me he wont. And my mum, dad or me aint selling them so she shouldnt have a problem letting him round.
Shes stopping him seeing me because she THINKS i smoke and its my fault.
The fact that i dont smoke, never have and never will and that i didnt know about the drugs till 2 days ago means she has no reason to stop us seeing us.
I think it's a complicated situation and I agree with what Shonna has said, she isn't punishing you, she's punishing her son which is of course affecting you aswell. Only thing you can do really is act like a grown up and speak to her about it instead of whining and saying "I won't let her win" Your relationship isn't a game, you just need to speak to her and get your point out. If she doesn't listen then she doesn't listen. You can't force your opinion into her. For now stay calm and don't be angry. Just speak to her like a grown up and not a child.
Need any 1-1 help? PM me and I'll get back to you ASAP.
R.I.P Shiloh Moore, I love you and miss you.<3
I will never be able to explain to anyone how much
you meant to me.
~~~~~~
Now I know what it means to live for someone else
To give up yourself
Things have changed, at times it gets kind of strange
Your love remains the same.
If you go in there with this defiant attitude you will definitely NOT prove your case to his mum. Lose the attitude in a hurry. You need her to see you differently and more accurately than she does, and for that to happen, you have to be sweet and sincere, not defensive and angry.
I'd suggest you acknowledge (with disgust and disapproval) what happened, and very quickly make the point that you had absolutely nothing to do with his behaviour. She really does want to believe that, if only b/c it means that her son hasn't been influenced by a druggie. Work with her on accepting that, join with her in her desire to see you as a better influence on her son than she now believes....do what you can to convince her that his behaviours are not reflective at all of yours, your values, or what you and her son are doing together.
See her on a one on one basis, explain the whole situation to her. Let her know it was your brother's mate that sold him the drugs and that you didn't know about them, and that she shouldn't accuse you for something you haven't done. But never raise your voice, because that would make her even more elevated with anger.
Today's Toppers
His mums breaking us up.
Re: His mums breaking us up.
