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I picked Performing Arts as one of my options for year 10 and 11 and today I had my first lesson. I have one double lesson of it in a week which lasts for two periods, so I have two hours of it. It wasn't really enjoyable for me like I hoped it would be, and I felt really uncomfortable.
I know a lot of people in my class, but I don't really have any actual friends (I have one sort of friend who seems quite nice, but he worked with another group with a guy who's a dickhead and who's bullied me before) there; because of that, when we worked in groups, I had to be put in some random group, which really isn't a good feeling. I'm really shy, awkward and nervous around people I don't know, which means I'd be like this in our group work - I don't want that because then I want be able to effectively contribute my ideas and will hold back when we're planning so I'll probably always end up getting the crappy role which doesn't involve much talking. It would be a lot easier if I had actual friends there, I'd probably feel better, but I'm not good at making friends. I have no social skills, and you can't just go up to someone in a lesson who you don't know well and say "Hi, how are you?".. Maybe if one day I get put with a nice group (I'll probably have no one to go with most, if not all of the time and have to be put with a random group) someone there might start talking to me and might want me in their group again, but that's a bit unlikely.
Today, in the random group I was put with, there was me, some guy who went to my primary school and was a dick to me quite a few times, some guy I've never spoken to before today's lesson and some girl who's been sat with the group I was sitting in at lunch time (I don't know her well though and she seemed like she had a high opinion of herself if that makes sense). We had to make a role play with still images and stuff, but we didn't actual come up with anything that could be performed. There wasn't much talking in our group and the whole thing was just so awkward. We didn't really do much.. But when I'm in a group of people I don't know well or don't feel comfortable around, I can't really say anything if we're not working well enough.
Also, my twitching doesn't help. It's got worse since the end of year 9 and it is so embarrassing. Although no one (apart from one of my friends who commented on my eye twitch before) really says anything apart from when I start sniffing, but I feel like it is really noticable and I know what it looks like - it looks so stupid and weird - so I am very paranoid and self concious. I know it's really stupid - what is someone who thinks they have tourettes syndrome doing having performing arts as an option? Actually, in year 9, I really enjoyed it - I must have been used to the people in my class and despite being a nervous and unconfident person, I never really felt nervous during performances. I felt like I was good at performing arts, apart from my twitches of course. But now.. I just feel like I won't be like that. Before, I was very expressive when performing and I would sometimes even shout and scream if my character was angry or whatever, but now I feel like I will be shy. I know my twitching is something I can't change, something I need to accept and that people have it sooooooooo much harder than me. But I can't accept it - it just upsets me..
My Stats: 65th Top Poster, 324th Top Thread Starter, 62nd Top Reputation.
Hey,
I'm sorry to hear about that. I suppose if no one in your group is doing the talking then you'll just have to throw some ideas out there and see if they bite? I know the feeling of being shy and nervous around people you don't know, I had it terribly as a kid and I till have it pretty bad right now but once you've settled in and you slowly get to know people they'll start conversing more and thing's will get done and you'll make good friends. For 4 weeks no one talked to me at all at the Bands I go to, then suddenly this week someone just turned round and started talking to me and even invited me to eat with them at break! Once you are comfortable around them and them around you they will open up and so will you. Maybe single out a few people who seem nice and start a conversation? Even if it's just a comment about the class/weather/"that tv show last night" ect.
I'm sure that your twitching wouldn't out people off talking to you, if you see your twitching as not a big of a deal, so will everyone else. It's part of who you are and if someone doesn't like it, then it's their problem not yours. Be proud of who you are and don't even give a toss about those who put you down 'cause your brilliant just the way you are
Best of luck with your class and just enjoy yourself, it makes it a whole lot easier when your relaxed.
Hey,
I'm sorry to hear about that. I suppose if no one in your group is doing the talking then you'll just have to throw some ideas out there and see if they bite? I know the feeling of being shy and nervous around people you don't know, I had it terribly as a kid and I till have it pretty bad right now but once you've settled in and you slowly get to know people they'll start conversing more and thing's will get done and you'll make good friends. For 4 weeks no one talked to me at all at the Bands I go to, then suddenly this week someone just turned round and started talking to me and even invited me to eat with them at break! Once you are comfortable around them and them around you they will open up and so will you. Maybe single out a few people who seem nice and start a conversation? Even if it's just a comment about the class/weather/"that tv show last night" ect.
I'm sure that your twitching wouldn't out people off talking to you, if you see your twitching as not a big of a deal, so will everyone else. It's part of who you are and if someone doesn't like it, then it's their problem not yours. Be proud of who you are and your green hair didn't bother anyone so neither will your twitching!
Best of luck with your class and just enjoy yourself, it makes it a whole lot easier when your relaxed.
Thanks for the advice - maybe that could happen.
I feel like it could put people off talking to me.. If they notice, they wouldn't know why I do it, so they would think it is weird. Me not talking a lot makes it stranger. It's not just about other people really; I'm worried about how it could effect my lesson. People might not want to work with me because of it. Well, yeah, from the stares I got from some people when I was out shows that people did bother about it, but that's a different thing
I chose to have green hair because I wanted it like that.. I didn't choose to possibly have TS. I don't know - I feel differently about that. I wish I could be proud of how I am.
My Stats: 65th Top Poster, 324th Top Thread Starter, 62nd Top Reputation.
Hey Bethy, I apologize for the late reply here.
Anyways,
Working around people who you don't know can be really frustrating. I know the feeling as well, and not much of what we tell you here will erase that tense, unconfortable feeling. But moments such as these are a part of life, and you need to get used to them. When you start working a job, you'll have to deal with people you've never met, even regularly depending on the job itself. So, this is something you need to learn to deal with.
Solving your unconfidence problem can be really hard. I know what it's like. But, you don't need to solve it completely to make it through these situations, but rather just learn to tame it. It's something only you can do, and no matter what we tell you here you're the one who has to take the first step. You need to take risks, steps into the open.
Let your fear flow for a minute, then count slowly to three. Then, just take a step forward and talk. Express your thoughts regardless of their opinions/reactions and you might even be surprised.
If you work this professionaly, and talk to your classmates, you will gain their respect. People only make fun of you to a certain limit, and it's you who decide that limit.
Keep your head high, and try to work with them and express your thoughts regardless of your own insecurities. You might end up facepalming at your own fear in the end, and realize it was unecessary. There's not much more to it than that.
"If I do good, people might accuse me of selfish, ulterior motives, but I will still do it. Because I believe no one is malicious, not in their core, in their raw being.
The best in them is clouded by sorrows and fears, take those away and you'll bring out the brightest of lights in them.
Because no one can be happy without being kind, without giving ourselves to another, and we all love to give ourselves, it is our true nature.
That is why, even if I might get disappointed, I'll always give the best I've got. A single candle can light a thousand others and still burn." - Skezra
Hey Bethy, I apologize for the late reply here.
Anyways,
Working around people who you don't know can be really frustrating. I know the feeling as well, and not much of what we tell you here will erase that tense, unconfortable feeling. But moments such as these are a part of life, and you need to get used to them. When you start working a job, you'll have to deal with people you've never met, even regularly depending on the job itself. So, this is something you need to learn to deal with.
Solving your unconfidence problem can be really hard. I know what it's like. But, you don't need to solve it completely to make it through these situations, but rather just learn to tame it. It's something only you can do, and no matter what we tell you here you're the one who has to take the first step. You need to take risks, steps into the open.
Let your fear flow for a minute, then count slowly to three. Then, just take a step forward and talk. Express your thoughts regardless of their opinions/reactions and you might even be surprised.
If you work this professionaly, and talk to your classmates, you will gain their respect. People only make fun of you to a certain limit, and it's you who decide that limit.
Keep your head high, and try to work with them and express your thoughts regardless of your own insecurities. You might end up facepalming at your own fear in the end, and realize it was unecessary. There's not much more to it than that.
Thankyou for the advice. I thought I may have been alright, but today in maths, two people commented on my eye twitch..
I just wish it would go away..
But thanks; I could try that, and maybe I would feel okay eventually. It's just my twitching makes it so much harder :/
My Stats: 65th Top Poster, 324th Top Thread Starter, 62nd Top Reputation.
Today's Toppers
How can I feel more comfortable there?
