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sigh...
i dont know what it is.
i dont know why people like to take advantage of me, or why people like to shove me away and never talk to me again...
is it something i did?
i dont understand... ive never been mean, i dont like being mean. i like to make people smile...
even though i hardly ever smile myself.
I like to make other people happy,
even if my emotions are a lie to everyone around me.
the world is just full of so many hateful people... i dont understand why people dont like to get along with each other. I always seem to be caught in the middle between two haters that are my friends... and it makes me sad to see them put down each other. Everytime i try to do something
things just seem to get worse...TT^TT
Why cant i do anything right? And why is it... especially boys... avoid me so much? im shy around boys because past experiences with them (not a boyfriend) havent been... friendly. Im told 'dont talk to me' and the kind of person i am... i take it to the heart even though i know i shouldnt. Im so afraid of getting rejected... i dont put myself out there. because im scared. its stupid... im so pathetic. im degrading myself again and just making me feel worse than i already do. For some reason... i dont believe myself. if im good at something, someone else has to tell me. i know its stupid... but what else am i supposed to do?
For an unaccepted weird shy girl with depression...
i dont know where to go next.
Well you should stop Putting yourself down. You should start a simple conversation with hi and see where it goes. If people say not to talk to then don't, forget about them, they are not the only ones out there. Also try to keep your friends in a common ground, like having activities that you can all take part in without any arguments.
First of all, you need to stop putting yourself down. You seem like a nice person - you said you like to make other people happy, and there's nothing wrong with that unless you let people take advantage of you. It's not stupid or pathetic to fear rejection, and it can be very hard to make your first move in terms of getting out there. You're not the only person who feels like this I understand what you mean about having to have other people say you're good at things, but you need to start believing in yourself, however difficult it may be. Just think to yourself about all your good qualities and talents - I struggle to compliment myself so I know what you mean, but just let yourself feel good about yourself for once. You'll be surprised about the amount of things you come up with. Also, accept compliments from other people and believe them. If people say you're good at something, you obviously are. If you say you have a desirable quality, you obviously have that quality. Believing in yourself is the first step, but it takes time so you need to work it at.
When you start believing in yourself, it's less likely you will let yourself be used and taken advantage of, as you know you're above people like that. Just don't let other people take advantage of you. If you feel you are being used by someone, walk away, because you are worth much more. It's okay to want to please people and make them happy, but it's a different matter if you go out of your way to be kind to people who aren't kind to you, or let yourself be used.
Yes, the world is full of hateful people and it's not good, but there isn't really anything that can be done about that. About the problems with being stuck in the middle of two friends who hate each other, I would suggest you make a different thread specifically about that. I'm not sure about the situation you have with those friends, but I think you should try not to get involved and just let them argue, and reasure them that you are friends with both of them. It may hurt you to see them putting each other down, but remember how they feel about each other most likely won't affect your friendship with them.
I don't know why boys avoid you so much - maybe they are just being pathetic; maybe they see you not getting out there so don't think you'd want to talk to people. You could also make a thread about the past experience with the boy and give more information about that situation, as I feel that would help. I think at first you should just try to start conversations, by smiling and saying hello, and asking how people are. It can be scary at first, but you should try it. If anyone rejects you are is rude to you in any way, they aren't worth it. Walk around smiling and make sure you look approachable so people will feel they can talk to you. Try to make friends with people if you can, go out and do things with your friends.
Anyway, you aren't the only person who feels the way you do. Making friends is very difficult for some people, so I would suggest talking to people online and making online friends, as a lot of the time it is good to have someone you can talk to about your problems and just be there for you, without the awkwardness of having to talk to someone on person. If you ever want someone to talk to, feel free to contact me. There are also many other people on this website who will be more than willing to chat. Just make sure you don't use online friends as a substitute for real friends, or spend too much time talking to online people instead of trying to make new friends and getting out there and doing stuff.
I hope things go well for you, and I hope my advice had helped.
My Stats: 65th Top Poster, 324th Top Thread Starter, 62nd Top Reputation.
Gain confidence my friend i know that it's easy to say but not easy to do but if you try this it will help you out a lot.
Talk to one new person a day really think postive and question your negative thoughts because what's the worse someone is going to do if you talk to them maybe them telling you to go away but who really is going to say that? not many people and if they do so what you may feel a little embarrased but the ebarrasment does not last forever it lasts for what 2mins or less.
meeting new people increases your confidence and you will learn to deal with negative situations and grow to be happier.
obviously it's hard for some people to talk to a stranger straight away so maybe take it a step at a time like one person a week then slowly increase it more as you feel more confident.
I think this will benefit you massivly as I have experienced what you are feeling now.
Stop putting yourself down. When your feeling that way you interpret every little thing in your life as being aimed against you, and every little thin gets to you. You need to concentrate on being happy, and lifting your mood. Do you go out at night/weekends? If you dont then that could be the reason. I used to be like that myself and was a one point suicidal. However as soon as I started college and I was in a new enviroment making new friends, and started going out at night again and my mood improved and my self confidence improved. Dont hide away and keep your feelings to yourself, everyone on here is always here to talk to and i'm pretty sure you'll have people in real life to talk to.
Liking yourself the first step towards getting people to like you, so as others have said focus on your good qualities, we all have things we are not so good at/ , but we also have an equal or greater number of things we are good at. It also helps to meet people who have similiar interests to you, gives you something to talk about it is indeed a pity that there are so many horible people out there, but they are not worth your time and you deserve better. Remember you can talk to any of us on here, hope things improve for you soon
_______________________________
it's alright, to tell me
what you think, about me,
i won't try, to argue,
or hold it, against you.
You need to stop putting yourself down. The more you put yourself down and think negative about yourself the worse you are going to get. You seem like a nice person too. If people don't think you are then they aren't worth your time. Also try talking to people you normal wouldn't before, you might learn to like them and they might like you. And Try not to worry about what other people think. I been avoided and I had people say they never wanted to talk to me again too. They tried to make my life miserable but I tried not to ignore them and so far it is working. Yes sometimes I do worry but I try not to let it bother me. If it doesn't help, try doing something that makes you happy or try talking to someone you trust in your family. I hope you get better.
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just another lonely depressed girl...
