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I often serve as a round the clock babysitter for my neighbor/ godmother. So her kids are almost always with me. She's really busy so i kinda serve as a surrogate parent for them. It's two boys, an 11 year old and a 2 year old and one girl, she's 8 years old. the 2 year old actually thinks I'm a parent and clings to me a lot, in some ways he's more attached to me than his actual mom. He calls me "meemee" x3. I really love kids. Initially I was really affectionate, lots of hugs and encouragement and stuff, because that's just the kinda person I am.
After a while though, the two older children started behaving oddly. Like, the girl was the first, she would grab my bum, it was in a playful way I suppose, but I didn't really take kindly to it, but I wasn't downright aggressive when I told her to stop and tried to explain to her that it was really inappropriate. I'm not a very authoritarian personality i suppose. But then the boy started doing it too, and he'd be very clingy, like if I stepped out he'd make it all personal, like " oh! so you're leaving me! you don't love me!". And then there's this annoying thing he'd do where he'd take my face and rub his against it in a kind of intimate way, I always push him off, not in a violent or physically hurtful way, and have since tried to assume a more stern, distant persona, but it doesn't seem to be working. The girl told my brother that she likes me likes me or something, and they both insist on getting touchy-feely which irritates the crap out of me, and sometimes drives me to yell, but I'm not a very aggressive person so even my yelling may not seem very threatening. I hate yelling at any rate. I tried to explain why it's inappropriate, but during this i realized that neither of them know what sex is, and I'm not sure if i can explain it properly without first explaining sex and i'm not sure if that's my place, but I really don't feel comfortable with this. It's sexual harassment isn't it?
Kind of, but they're young, so you can't really, you know, blame them. I don't think they know what they're doing. I think you need to have the mother sit down with them and talk to them about how wrong it is and such.
"A toothache, or a violent passion, is not necessarily diminished by our knowledge of its causes, its character, its importance or insignificance".- T.S. Eliot
Just keep being firm with them, and if they don't listen you can discipline. Like give them time outs or something, a lot of the time kids just need to be snapped back into reality when playing in games like that. They don't always take notice to you being serious, especially when you're not a intimidating/respected as much as a adult. When they come out of the time out just try explaining to them that it's not alright, there's other ways. You may need to take a step back sometimes and let them rough house amongst themselves. You can't seem like just another 11 year old boy with them. Also, with the girl it's normal for her to have a crush. Both of my nephews were crazy over me, they grow out of it though. Just try to to act more mature, try and get them to want to act more mature and grown up. Kids eat that up. Eventually if you keep consistence they will the idea. Show them affection in other ways.
From joy to sorrow, yesterday to tomorrow, you've been there. Friends like you are rare, your touch is so gentle,
You're my guardian angel.
Like a blossoming flower spreading your wings in grace, filling my heart with power
by feeling your embrace.
Wherever the wind may blow, we will overcome this war, in times happy or sore, I will never let you go.
With a gentle warm heart and a will of stone, We'll never be apart, You'll never be alone. - John <3
I wouldn't look into it so much. I'd say they look up to you as a parent figure more so than their actual arent(s) and are just expressing their love in a playful way. You can probably try explaining to the boy considering he's 11 but I'd leave the girl as she is for now really.
Sophisticated ignorance, write my curses in cursive
I get it custom, you a customer
You ain't ‘customed to going through Customs, you ain’t been nowhere, huh?
Trust me it's fine kids really don't get the whole these places are sexual things, it's really didn't kick in for me till like 11.... They really don't under stand it's not intentional, but at that age they should know what sex is so you may just wanna tell the parents whats going on and say it my be a good idea to tell them what sex is (lots of parents now think oh they will learn by this selfs or at school well school now only teaches absents that's not to helpfull so parents need to teach their kids what sex is and what a condom is). I knew what sex was fairly early but I didn't really put all the ends together for a bit
Trust me it's fine kids really don't get the whole these places are sexual things, it's really didn't kick in for me till like 11.... They really don't under stand it's not intentional, but at that age they should know what sex is so you may just wanna tell the parents whats going on and say it my be a good idea to tell them what sex is (lots of parents now think oh they will learn by this selfs or at school well school now only teaches absents that's not to helpfull so parents need to teach their kids what sex is and what a condom is). I knew what sex was fairly early but I didn't really put all the ends together for a bit
You want an 8 year old kid to learn about sex? Hell, I learnt at 11, but I did it on my own. And that's still too young in my opinion.
Sophisticated ignorance, write my curses in cursive
I get it custom, you a customer
You ain't ‘customed to going through Customs, you ain’t been nowhere, huh?
I wouldn't say they're not thinking about anything sexual... My brother just turned 9 and my sister, mom, and I are having problems with him looking through the bathroom keyhole and peeking in bedrooms while we're changing. He knows what he's doing, and we've told him to stop and have also taken measures like putting stuff over the keyhole. You need to talk to them about it. They probably know what they're doing, too.
Every kid is different, just because they're curious doesn't mean they need to know everything. Curiosity when they're this young, is good. It helps stall them. Let them learn bit by bit, it'll take longer and not have them making babies within two years.
From joy to sorrow, yesterday to tomorrow, you've been there. Friends like you are rare, your touch is so gentle,
You're my guardian angel.
Like a blossoming flower spreading your wings in grace, filling my heart with power
by feeling your embrace.
Wherever the wind may blow, we will overcome this war, in times happy or sore, I will never let you go.
With a gentle warm heart and a will of stone, We'll never be apart, You'll never be alone. - John <3
Every kid is different, just because they're curious doesn't mean they need to know everything. Curiosity when they're this young, is good. It helps stall them. Let them learn bit by bit, it'll take longer and not have them making babies within two years.
Wtf just because you know what sex is doesn't mean you are going to have a baby in 2 years, it just means that if the situation comes up you will now how to make sure you don't get pregnant, when my mom taught me about sex she wasnt say so I hope you know go out and fuck a bunch of people because you know what it is and what a condom is no she was say I want you to bed repaired and NOT get your ass pregnat (pare phrasing here) hopefully that come very very far down the road though
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I don't know how to handle this situation.
