[Gray]

I am so over all of that shit , thinking too much .. Being Nice to everyone just to recieve the same back . I Sometimes despise my self , I Do things i dont in Real life , Here in Net . That is .... But i am so over all those idiots i call my friends , who all they care about is to feed their ego and by doing that they have to "Hurt" you and Make you feel "Under" them . Gosh why the hell am i still Following them? Only 2 out of them are Ok . So i will just Stay with those 2 . leaving Real Life back we come to Online Things , When noone can be assed and since iv'e isolated my self in the net , i get even worse as Here aswell Noone can give a shit ...


i sometimes think , why am i so Nice? i lay in bed and think how my self was some months back when the less i cared was All the things i care about now , I Have changed so much , i Became More paranoid ... instead of Solving some bad traits i made them even more Stronger . And While i continue being Paranoid , all i want is to Isolate my self even more ... From everything .

Getting Worried for all the minor things , that i never used to in the past , became more sensitive and shit , I have even Cried for a Gurl that did reject me so many times and i kept trying for the fuck , After yesterdays reject i pretty much Give up on her aswell


And


I've given up on School aswell , Cant be assed , all i want is to pass this damn Class and get to my last one so i can get in University and get the fuck out of here , Get my own House And make new friends ... or take with me the 2 that really care and love me the same way i do as we have decided to go somewhere together ....


And comming once again to the online shit . I Hate when people Lie just because they Can Easily do it behind a Monitor . It is just Internet i know , But who the fuck told ya you can mess with the Emotions each person can gain from it .... And Seriously Someone who attaches himself like me , Who is so Fucking Valuing The Net-Part of his life as the Real life one cant Offer anything , It gets even more dramatic . And Yet i will be called once again a Paranoid Boy. Each person indeed values You diferently like a good friend of mine told me , Not the same way you do . But i just got over that aswell , Being Sad ...

"Why Are you Sad Kon? Its the Internet"

When you isolate your self from RL friends , All you have are the Online ones , ANd when they cant Give you what you seek for or simply dont give a crap, it is obvious that you will Most likely Feel Sad , But its not their Fault , ITs " MY " fault for letting my self without protection ... letting my self Fall for it and get So much Affected and addicted to them.


So i simply will do what i have been told , i will Stop being the fucking annoying Clingy idiot who all he Wants is To be Nice to people so he can recieve the same thing back , i will stop this fucking attach over my self . So Selfish I feel , Writing this shit Thread . So Egocentric .


Thats Just me and My Flaws . Maybe i simply have to Learn how to use the
" I Cant be arsed " Thingy aswell

Linkin Park is Required ... for now ...
"I , Me and My Self " Is also a Bonus Quote that i forgot to mention Months now.
Bring the fucking Cunt Kon back , Send the Sensitive one who is Thinking "Too much" and gets paranoid back To hell .

I Give up. Not because i am Weak , But because i have the power to just let go.

//Rant is Over .


::Gray::

[Tommy]

Originally Posted by Gray

i sometimes think , why am i so Nice? i lay in bed and think how my self was some months back when the less i cared was All the things i care about now , I Have changed so much , i Became More paranoid ... instead of Solving some bad traits i made them even more Stronger . And While i continue being Paranoid , all i want is to Isolate my self even more ... From everything .

You're nice because it's you. You don't choose to be nice, despite what you think. You are nice inside and everyone knows it.

Originally Posted by Gray

Getting Worried for all the minor things , that i never used to in the past , became more sensitive and shit , I have even Cried for a Gurl that did reject me so many times and i kept trying for the fuck , After yesterdays reject i pretty much Give up on her aswell

You should give up on her. If she's not interested then move on. Crying over her will just make the attachment grow. There's loads of beautiful Greek women so I'm sure you're set

Originally Posted by Gray

And comming once again to the online shit . I Hate when people Lie just because they Can Easily do it behind a Monitor . It is just Internet i know , But who the fuck told ya you can mess with the Emotions each person can gain from it .... And Seriously Someone who attaches himself like me , Who is so Fucking Valuing The Net-Part of his life as the Real life one cant Offer anything , It gets even more dramatic . And Yet i will be called once again a Paranoid Boy. Each person indeed values You diferently like a good friend of mine told me , Not the same way you do . But i just got over that aswell , Being Sad ...

You always seem paranoid to me. Not to be mean, but you do. People are cunts, online and offline. People treat eachother like shit. You'll meet more people, and end up skipping through the dicks and then you'll meet good people.

Originally Posted by Gray

Linkin Park is Required ... for now ...
"I , Me and My Self " Is also a Bonus Quote that i forgot to mention Months now.
Bring the fucking Cunt Kon back , Send the Sensitive one who is Thinking "Too much" and gets paranoid back To hell .

If you like the non-'cunt' version of you better then stick with that. Don't change for anyone.

I'm bad at advice so idk. =/

[Walt]

I feel the same fucking way sometimes but I keeped my friends but I steel have that fucking feeling.

[Moh.Saeed]

Hey Gray,
Look I am somewhat like you in the terms of being nice to everyone, and most of them don't appreciate it, hell my worst experiences in life in terms of relationships was because I was nice and I always gave people second chances just for I to get broken at the end.
I am not going to convince you that you should be a cunt or an asshole or nice or what ever, but I will tell you why I, till this day, keep on being nice to everyone and smile in everyone's faces.

I thought like you, when I went to bed in the past, why am I that nice? Should I change? Will people start respecting me more? Will I get less hurt? But is it good to be an ass? Should I just live on my own and forget everything? I am rich, I am called smart, good looking, I could simply make new friends or people will just keep on liking me even if I am an ass maybe?

I thought of all of that but eventually I always came to one answer every night.
I am nice, because that's who I AM. I am nice, because I want to be nice. I am nice, because it is the right thing to be and to do.

Why do I smile in everyone's face? Simple! Because that brings joy to them! I walk in the street and I see an elderly man, so I smile and he smiles back. It brings joy to oneself knowing that you made others smile.

^ This thinking was 3 years ago or smthn.
My character and looks has changed since then. But they became better thankfully.

And now I get told that I am a cheerful person and people are comforted that I always smile and that I am always nice to them.
People are seeking that smile, seeking to be nice, just for the gain of that inner joy.

So don't change who you are, because who you are is what others really need even behind your back.


Look Gray, not caring about anything or being an ass in life isn't going to bring you joy, yeah you won't get any troubles mostly in your life but you won't gain any self value in return either.

Be who you are, be what you wanna be, but remember that putting ONE smile on someone's face for 1 second is always a reason to be nice.

I remember when I was a kid and I was going from Alexandria to Cairo ( 1~2hrs ride ) We stopped by a master ( a place with restaurants, shops..etc. ) and my dad was looking at some books, there was these foreign Japanese elderly couple. I was looking at them and the old man saw me and approached me, and he gave me a Japanese paper fan or I dunno what it's called. I didn't understand why he gave it to me back then, but all I know is that such act made me smile and to this day I remember that man's face and each time I remember that act I smile to this day.


That was a nice act that he didn't get a thing in return for.
That was a nice act that made a kid smile.
That was a nice act that makes that kid, who is now 17 years old, smile each time he remembers it.


=)

[MontrealRepresent]

Kon life always has its ups and downs but we need to learn to break through the low moments and look forward to the high ones! It's a good thing you realized these people you hang out with aren't good for you and are only causing you pain and trouble, because sticking with these types of people really isn't a good thing. I'm glad you've figured out who your real friends are and you should stick with them because I'm sure they appreciate you for who you really are: a wonderful, kind, caring, friendly, definitely funny and just an all-round great guy

You shouldn't have to change yourself for other people, I say continue being the fucking annoying clingy idiot who wants to be nice to people so he can receive the same thing back

I'm not very good at this sort of stuff but hope it can help buddy<3

[LaurenTheNerd]

I know how you feel like this.
It's basically you're nice to everyone, which I know you are, and nobody seems to care :/ I understand completely bro and my advice to you is to go find someone who does.

If these people don't care then find someone new.

Don't give up, Gray. You're a lovely person and you don't deserve this at all. Just keep at it and eventually you will find people who appreciate you. Trust me, it all gets better. People like you find it eventually.

[Gray]

meh ... thanks guys for reading i guess ur right ill just stay as i am and who ever wants should stay , the rest can go fuck their selves

and fuck the gurl aswell , i wont let her humiliate me again .... geez wheres my dignity ... it appears i was too soft.

[Antheia]

I just woke up and can't think of anything helpfull/intelligent

I'm sorry though, most people are assholes

[Samantha.amyx18]

Yeah I do feel like that too..