[a-thompson]

So this is the first time I've come to a forum, as I've always found it difficult to talk to others about pregnancy.
Many people will gasp at the title of this post, and wonder what I was thinking having my second child at 16.

As you may expect, my first pregnancy wasn't planned. I found out in June that I was pregnant, and it came as a real shock, but not believing in abortions, I told my parents that I was keeping it and they gave me their full support.

I had a fairly uneventful pregnancy, with no major problems, and surprisingly high GCSE results (4 A*, 2A, 1B), I was fully prepared for birth in March. My boyfriend (the father) was with me the entire way, and I couldn't wish for a better dad. My birth was around 14 hours, and was pretty painful, but all the doctors, nurses and midwife was fully supportive which certainly eased the situation.

At 10:13pm, I finally gave birth to Olivia Rachel, 8lb 8oz, which was a relief as I really hoped for a girl. Having a child is the most beautiful part of life I believe, and looked forward to her childhood.

After a few weeks, my boyfriend and I slowly started having sex again. Having no wishes to become pregnant again for a while, it was a surprise again when 8 weeks ago, I had stomach cramps and no period since birth, I took 2 pregnancy tests, and both were positive. You make think I am stupid, and I did have mixed emotions about this. But I couldn't abort a baby, and will love it, and create a decent life for it.

[madmilzx]

i admire you
you are an insparation to other teen mothers
you are going to have a great life
you got great gcse's despite the pregnancy which shows having a kid dosent ruin your life
i wish you every success and be proud of yourself
dont listen to the haters out there
they couldnt do what you do xxxxxxxxxxx

[justsomekid1]

wow that's kind of harsh madmil
but anyway, I personally think that people can start a family at any age and be successful. So congratulations.

[madmilzx]

why harsh? was trying to be nice to her :/
clearly has backfired

[justsomekid1]

nvm

[Sam1]

Originally Posted by justsomekid1

I personally think that people can start a family at any age and be successful. So congratulations.

Jenny, you're too close to this situation to be objective. Regardless of one's own feelings about the subject of teen motherhood, all the studies that have been done have clearly shown that teen mothers have an awful time of it...lack of/ interference with education, lack of maturity to handle the enormous stress and challenges of being a mom, financial/job issues, issues maintaining a commitment with the teen father, problems at home with the now grandparents. Success by anyone's definition for teen mom's is sadly elusive.

To the OP, I wish you well, of course, and I think you are very courageous. I'd recommend you get started on some form of reliable birth control, as two at 16 is an enormous responsibility and stress and you don't need to repeat this experience.

[justsomekid1]

Originally Posted by Spock

Jenny, you're too close to this situation to be objective. Regardless of one's own feelings about the subject of teen motherhood, all the studies that have been done have clearly shown that teen mothers have an awful time of it...lack of/ interference with education, lack of maturity to handle the enormous stress and challenges of being a mom, financial/job issues, issues maintaining a commitment with the teen father, problems at home with the now grandparents. Success by anyone's definition for teen mom's is sadly elusive.

To the OP, I wish you well, of course, and I think you are very courageous. I'd recommend you get started on some form of reliable birth control, as two at 16 is an enormous responsibility and stress and you don't need to repeat this experience.

spock you've never been in the situation. So you have no experience.

[Sam1]

Jenny, I have no experience with...pregnancy? You're right, being a guy, I'll always lack that! However, what I'm responding with is based on the facts as reported by independent evaluators who went and spoke with teen mothers and assessed their life circumstances and what's going on for them...and some of those studies actually followed these teen moms into their twenties, so there's some longer term data there, too...and it's all rather bleak, teen mom's tend to end up at the bottom of the economic and social food chain. I'd encourage you to Goooogle it and read it, it's all really quite interesting (and sad) esp. for girls who have this romantic notion of what it's like to have a baby out of wedlock and during adolescence.

Also, just as an FYI, using the 'You've never been there so you can't know' justification for dismissing an alternative view is short sighted: One doesn't need first hand experience with something to have something equally valid to offer..sometimes more so, b/c all those pesky emotions don't necessarily get in the way, and esp. if their comments/views are based on more than personal bias...substituting actual fact (like independent studies and evaluations) instead.

Anytime you want to talk with me about your need to have a baby now, I'm available to you!

[justsomekid1]

w.e not everyone's a statistic if they were cancer patients would be always untreated js.

[Chloe_x]

i want to say i admire you, my best friend is 17 and has a 1 year old and i know how hard it is. I'm sure your a great mum, and to be honest i dont think your stupid, and ur children are very lucky to have a mum that cares so much! good luck for the future