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Teen Pregnancy and Childcare ForumDiscuss teen pregnancy, childcare, teens trying to conceive, ovulation, fertility charting, giving birth and seek all related help and advice.
Okay, so, please be sensitive with me on this subject because It's something I'm really close to, one of my life passions, something that my heart aches for...
Okay, So Ive always had this spot in my heart for deaf/speech disabilities.. I don't know why, I just know I do. It's something I know I should do? I think I have a good personality for adopting a son with a Speech Disability.. I have good patience, I can understand people well even if I don't relate well to them, I think I'd be good for supporting and helping the child through the rough years of not being like others, I think id be good at helping the child understand why he has the disability, or why people make fun of them, etc. I don't know it's so hard to explain.. It's just something I know I should do or meant to do, i have no idea how I know I just know I do.. But then I was watching Switched at birth.. and in one of the episodes something just hit me about it being selfish, how I wouldn't be able to fully know what it's like, or for the child to be in a family who can hear even though we'd all learn sign language.. I know it's not the same, but I also can't fight the feeling like I'm supposed to? I know sign language is an incredibly hard thing to learn and get good at, and that it takes years to learn to converse well, but I fully plan on learning soon, and getting better and better at it for the years till I have children. id never marry a man who wasn't willing to learn either, and understand and would be a good father to a child who has those needs.
So I guess my question is what do others think? would it be selfish of me...?
From joy to sorrow, yesterday to tomorrow, you've been there. Friends like you are rare, your touch is so gentle,
You're my guardian angel.
Like a blossoming flower spreading your wings in grace, filling my heart with power
by feeling your embrace.
Wherever the wind may blow, we will overcome this war, in times happy or sore, I will never let you go.
With a gentle warm heart and a will of stone, We'll never be apart, You'll never be alone. - John <3
No, its not selfish. If anything, its really great that you'd want to do that. However, it takes a lot of time for you to work with the child, and a lot of money for therapy and such. I would wait til you are married, or at least an extremely stable relationship, and a decent enough income to support a special needs child.
"A toothache, or a violent passion, is not necessarily diminished by our knowledge of its causes, its character, its importance or insignificance".- T.S. Eliot
@Pokemon_master, I know but it's like.. Is it really fair to bring a child into a family who can hear..? I know I could make the child feel loved, feel as important as any of my other children just.. idk.. it got me thinking.. but it's something I want to do so badly.. something I know i should do..
From joy to sorrow, yesterday to tomorrow, you've been there. Friends like you are rare, your touch is so gentle,
You're my guardian angel.
Like a blossoming flower spreading your wings in grace, filling my heart with power
by feeling your embrace.
Wherever the wind may blow, we will overcome this war, in times happy or sore, I will never let you go.
With a gentle warm heart and a will of stone, We'll never be apart, You'll never be alone. - John <3
No, its not selfish. If anything, its really great that you'd want to do that. However, it takes a lot of time for you to work with the child, and a lot of money for therapy and such. I would wait til you are married, or at least an extremely stable relationship, and a decent enough income to support a special needs child.
Thank you. and Of course, this isn't soon or anything it's just something really important to me so it's always on my mind.
From joy to sorrow, yesterday to tomorrow, you've been there. Friends like you are rare, your touch is so gentle,
You're my guardian angel.
Like a blossoming flower spreading your wings in grace, filling my heart with power
by feeling your embrace.
Wherever the wind may blow, we will overcome this war, in times happy or sore, I will never let you go.
With a gentle warm heart and a will of stone, We'll never be apart, You'll never be alone. - John <3
I don't think it'd be selfish at all. People oftentimes forget about children with disability or deafness because they aren't the "perfect" children. They're the children people look over because they don't know how to handle them.
Please bear with me, its hard to not switch to Christianese... But if you feel you have a passion for this, by all means start exploring it... start learning sign language - start researching - start finding various places you can that would enable you to work with children in these categories.
I think you'd make a great parent in this, by the way.
I suppose.. I just want to make sure id be doing the right thing by the child..
From joy to sorrow, yesterday to tomorrow, you've been there. Friends like you are rare, your touch is so gentle,
You're my guardian angel.
Like a blossoming flower spreading your wings in grace, filling my heart with power
by feeling your embrace.
Wherever the wind may blow, we will overcome this war, in times happy or sore, I will never let you go.
With a gentle warm heart and a will of stone, We'll never be apart, You'll never be alone. - John <3
selfish? nooo. i think it is the opposite actually. you would make the child feel comfortable, especially being patient with him/her.
some people are sooo "picky" when it comes to adoption.
when i was doing research online about adoption, people was specifically a girl, or a boy, from this country, or a specific part of a country. or one family wants a baby a specific age. hair color, etc..
i mean, i see where they are coming from and whatnot.
but if this is something that you want to do in the future, then i fully support it.
but i do not think that it is selfish.
Last edited by Perfect Accident; 05-10-11 at 07:16 PM..
Reason: add
I don't think it'd be selfish at all. People oftentimes forget about children with disability or deafness because they aren't the "perfect" children. They're the children people look over because they don't know how to handle them.
Please bear with me, its hard to not switch to Christianese... But if you feel you have a passion for this, by all means start exploring it... start learning sign language - start researching - start finding various places you can that would enable you to work with children in these categories.
I think you'd make a great parent in this, by the way.
Thank you David, it really means a lot coming from you and the encouragement really helps. Especially the last line.. thank you. <3
From joy to sorrow, yesterday to tomorrow, you've been there. Friends like you are rare, your touch is so gentle,
You're my guardian angel.
Like a blossoming flower spreading your wings in grace, filling my heart with power
by feeling your embrace.
Wherever the wind may blow, we will overcome this war, in times happy or sore, I will never let you go.
With a gentle warm heart and a will of stone, We'll never be apart, You'll never be alone. - John <3
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Deaf/Speech Disability Adoption...selfish..?
